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Tuesday, January 4, 2011

If i Die tonight.......

This year,2011,i wanted to be a better person,and i know to be a better person,i have to perform my duty as a muslim,to be a devoted servant of Allah,my lord....
It's been a while since i reflect my life,and with this new courage i begin my soul searching again...
I used to be at peaced,and feel closed to Him,that is when i started to wear hijjab...
Although its not prefect,i mean there;s so much to learned,but somehow i feel calm.But in the middle of my journey i gave in to the temptation of Satan,who swore to make us,me children of Adam,lost and drag us together to hell....I know i'm losing it,i can feel it slipped away,but my heart is too heavy to reach for Hidayah that He gave me....The worst part is i know every single thing i did go against His rules,but i can't stop...
But Alhamdulilah,Because my Lord Allah is generous and forgiving,He give me the way,i force my heart to take whatever left,and try to rebuild my strength again....
Today a dear friend of mine give me this linkhttp://www.kalam.tv/ur/video/58353/index.html,a touching story about a muslim australian girl who find her way back 3 weeks before the angle of death come to take her away,i sigh,and tears drops from my eyes,i envy her so much.....And i asked myself,what if i die tonight?
Do i have place in heaven?or absolute hell?
Allah do forgive me,give me chance to repent,guide me and give me strengths not to fall again...
have you guys ever wonder"what if i die tonight?"

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